Tuesday, January 14, 2014

I must confess...

True Life: I have become a fan of "The Bachelor."

What started as a fun contest at work with Emily's Bachelorette season, turned into a curiosity to see what ridiculousness would unfold with future casts. 

Last night, I started thinking a bit about current season... 
I mean why do we get so obsessed with watching this?
Juan Pablo Galavis

 Is it because of hunky, Juan Pablo? 
Well, I'm sure that helps.. His fatherly love for his little girl Camila, Latin accent, dance moves, and lightheartedness can only make most women swoon. But there is something that us women do on a daily basis to ourselves and other women that I noticed by watching a little closer on last night's show. 

Victoria showed her true colors last night. This 24 year old got a bit intoxicated and her feelings of rejection of not having 1 on 1 time with Juan left her drunk and sobbing. The ladies in the house, and myself included, began immediately judging her actions. Confusing their own snarky comments and whispering conversations with true concern for her well being.

Why do we do this?

 One gal, Renee, surprised me. She seems to be the mother of the group, running after Victoria and trying to calm her and help her to no avail. Then Juan pops on the scene and shows such concern for Victoria's feelings, and although he lets her know she isn't the one for him, his reasoning is based on the love for what he wants for him and his daughter. 

What I saw while all of this 'drama' was unfolding on the show is how the ladies were each reacting, and how I have seen similar qualities in myself and other women that I know when it pertains to other women.

We compare ourselves to these women and we judge them. 

We sit and watch the intro of each contestant, and try to compare our current life's situation to what they are doing with theirs. How are we better than them? Have we made it? Have we failed?  Where do we need to adjust or make improvements? 

We have to focus on showing love instead of judgment. We too have things we are working on, so how can we point the finger? Most of us can relate. We find similarities in ourselves through some of these women in the show. For those of us who are in our 20's or 30's, single and wanting to "find love," we relate to these ladies in their stories of broken hearts and their longing for something that is missing in their lives. Looking for someone who lives up to their dream image of the perfect man, who will sweep them off their feet and carry them into the sunset. 

Looking for love in all of the wrong places. In reality, nothing on this earth will ever fulfill us. 

Only Jesus will. 

Some of us can relate to Victoria, burying our emotions in those extra glasses of wine you know you shouldn't have had, to try and make the pain go away. But let me tell you sweetie, that pain will come right back once you've sobered up. 

I've been there. I thought a relationship would help me become happy, and you know what it brought a lot of happiness. But at the end of the day, I still had a sense of emptiness. 
I still had a lack of confidence in who I was, and I still felt unsure about my future. 

Last year I gave my life to Jesus, and He changed that. 

He allowed me to see my true identity in who He is. I can trust in His plan for my life and know that it will get me to the best destination ever imagined. In times of trouble, I can stand on His word and take my eyes off the situation - because He is in control. I can see others good, as He sees ours. Taking my judgmental thoughts and turning them into prayers and helpful words and actions. Becoming one with other believers, just as He wants us to be. Knowing that I have a true purpose in my life, and living it for Him. 

It's so important we show love to one another. We show love to those "Victoria"s in the world, that have felt rejection and didn't handle it well. One thing about Jesus is He was rejected, but He will not reject you. There is no person or thing on this earth that I can promise that will treat you the same as Him. 

He is always there, He always understands, and always comes through. 

So, what do you think? 
Have you ever felt relationship = happiness?
Who are you Bachelor picks?
P.S. My picks are Renee, Andi, Cassandra, & Clare... 


  1. Great post! And you are speaking truth... only Jesus can truly fill the void and give us internal joy!! I do love watching the bachelor but I'm behind already this season. I plan on catching up this weekend. :-)


  2. "Is it because of hunky, Juan Pablo?" Yes, yes it is. :)

  3. Amen!! This is exactly what I am learning right now. I have absolutely looked in all the wrong places for fulfillment and I am finally accepting that I will only find it in Him. Thank you for re-enforcing this and reminding us that we all need to be kinder and more gracious.

  4. This is a beautiful post! Thank you!!


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